Friday, 14 December 2012

I Wanna Job!


I'M THINKING of going to an employment agency to see what work they can get me. My skills are: touch-typing 70wpm (actual speed, not racing) with audio typing experience, shorthand, excellent telephone skills, full computer literacy (if I don't know a program I can pick it up in no time). Oh and superb English ~ unlike the school-leavers of today, I know how to use an apostrophe. I have excellent editing skills. Oh and I understand and speak German (my written German is atrocious). Plus some French... I actually have all the skills to be a secretary or PA but I'd only do that job for a female boss... So do you think I'd get a good job then? 

Oh and by the way I haven't worked in 16 years and have no references. I don't see why I should keep my background hidden. If I tell my future employer about the chronic fatigue syndrome and bipolar episodes they'll be duty-bound by the Disability Discrimination Act to treat me good!

I desire a minimum £25,000 a year ($40,295) ~ I don't think that's too much to ask. My rent's £200, and when you add on transport (£35.60 weekly for a zones 1-3 travelcard) and the totally unjust council tax, which could easily be about £50 a week, I'd need to be taking home a good £500 to make working worthwhile.

So what do y'all think? Comments please!



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I love this song: I was looking for a job and then I found a job and heaven knows I'm miserable now...

THE SMITHS: HEAVEN KNOWS I'M MISERABLE NOW

a truly awful song by an awful group... but the message is spot-on~!!


THIS is WAY BETTER than anything the Smiths could ever have knocked out...
dance music, as a well-known intellectual at my old university once declared "says nothing to me about my life" ... well that may be so, but THIS marvellous track says a million times more than the dreary old Smiths ever could!

QUENCH: DREAMS (SEBASTIAN LEGER)


QUENCH: DREAMS ~ ORIGINAL MIX
this is one fantastic tune!!



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5 comments:

  1. Why would you only be line managed by a female?

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  2. What I meant is, I'd only be secretary to a woman (traditional role reversal). Any other job, I don't care who my boss is :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't understand why you wouldn't want to support a male manager. If you're serious about getting back into employment you can't be that unrealistic. I hope I'm not being rude but it's a very competitive market and you can't really afford to be making demands like that.

    Anyway, like I said I don't mean to offend, and if this is something you are truly serious about, I wish you the best of luck. For what it's worth (I've been reading without commenting for quite some time) I think it's a positive move and definitely in the right direction. Going to an agency is a brilliant idea, there is no commitment and they can at least give you some idea of what is around.

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  4. GLEDWOOD BUT I'M NOT SIGNED IN:

    I don't know whether any man would want me as his secretary anyway. I have zero secretarial experience... I have all the skills as I wanted to be a journalist earlier in life. And I used to take live football reports for the local paper (so that's the audiotyping experience). And used to type ads into the local paper full time. So I have these skills.

    I once got a comment implying that because I was a junkie no way could I ever have held a job down blah blah of course I have worked. I only got into heroin aged 28: I had a life before that.

    Anyway thanks for your answers. Seriously I think it's not that realistic that most blokes would want me as their secretary and I probably wouldn't do well in the interview. If the potential boss were female I'd interview far better because I'd be more confident about actually working with her 1-2-1. I think frankly most men would find having a male secretary a bit weird... (who knows I could be completely wrong)

    anyway I'm going to that temp agency next week and will report back!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I typed in a whole reply earlier but it failed to register. I'm not signed in...


    To be honest I don't know if most blokes would want a male secretary. Also if I interviewed for a potential woman boss I'd be more confident of working for her well.

    I think a lot of male bosses might feel it weird, having a male secretary... but I could be completely wrong.


    I'm going to at least 1 employment agency next week and will report back!!!

    ReplyDelete

Shoot!