HEROIN IS A DRUG TO MAKE THE WORLD GO AWAY

THIS IS A BLOG ABOUT A LIFE WITHOUT HEROIN



Tuesday 24 April 2012

Books

LAST NIGHT I came up with skeleton plots for all three of these children's books I've been on about. I also produced the first couple of pages of book 1 ~ 380 wonderful words. I'm aiming to push myself to produce at least a thousand words a day of fair copy.

My only problem with these books is that stories two and three are very much more exciting than book one, which is an introductory volume. I don't know whether to rejiggle the plot to make it more dramatic, or just to keep it as it is. Book one, you see, has a kind of moral to it, which the others don't. I can't be any more specific than that as it is unprofessional to discuss one's literary works before they are written.

As for this rehab. Ukh. I still want to go but I'm really not looking forward to it. Detoxing from methadone is like a slow torture. I'm only glad I'll be able to take quetiapine in there (the antipsychotic), which SHOULD knock me senseless every night. Because the one of the main withdrawal symptoms of opiates is a complete lack of sleep, which goes on for days and days.

I woke up today feeling like living crap. Very depressed. My one ambition in life is to get off drugs and get these three books published (hopefully by multinational conglomerates; I'm not interested in self-publishing). Then as far as I'm concerned, I can drop dead. That's how I feel today. Oh, and I hope my books get made into massive feature films so my family can be rolling in money.

I'm not at all sure I'd be able to post on a blog from a detox unit. Of the two I've been in, one didn't allow mobile phones. The other did, but the detox there was terrible. Well that's another story.

I'm trying to steel enough enthusiasm within myself to get at least another two pages done of this book. It only took so long to get to even this point, where I'm just starting out on a story that has been in my head for over a year, because I simply couldn't envisage that story clearly enough. I'm not one of those people who writes into a vacuum. I like to know precisely where things are going. Then my one task is to turn a tale in my head into words on a page. What I hate doing is scratching my head, wondering what's supposed to happen next.

Well I'm going to have to go. I really feel joyless today and my landlord is poking round my house. Oh what fun. Take care everyone...

6 comments:

bugerlugs63 said...

I didn't notice my reduction of methadone from 70ml to 30 ml too much . . . But I've been told the last 30ml is harder.
I wouldn't consider going into hospital for it though. It can be done very gradually or you could transfer to Subutex from 30ml methadone, as that is easier to wean.
Would be great if you get the first of these three of the ground.
My 5 year old "Hamper" loves the "animal people" books, with a little bit of naughtiness and lots of silliness . . . But maybe you're aiming at older children.
I hope you stay focused and do this. I know how hard this self-discipline milarky can be to sustain . . . On a daily basis.
My new blog thing just paragraphs the same as the old one. Just by "return" . . . I take it that's what you mean by paragraphs.
Hope tomorrow is more full of joy for you.
With love x

bugerlugs63 said...

Hey, I just realised I read yesterdays post after todays, then I came back here to comment . . . And you obviously no longer need the paragraphing advice ;-)
I'm a bit retarded.
x

Bev said...

Your book ideas sound great.1,000 words a day is great.Keep up the good work.

Akelamalu said...

Well you've made a great start on your book Gleds - good luck with it. Don't give up on the detox, it could be the answer to all your problems. x

Syd said...

Gleds, I hope that you do the detox deal. Let us know how you are. Good luck with the books. I'm glad that you have a project that you are enthusiastic about.

Gledwood said...

BUGGERLUGZ: No the book is aimed at 6 year olds plus. I think I'd have great difficulty aiming an animal story at the 8-12 age group Harry Potter and similar books are written for.

I'm still in 2 minds about whether or not to go into a unit. My shit arse clinic have just conceded to let me collect 3 times a week, however every time I come in I have to drink that days dose under supervision. Which made me hit the roof when I heard about it.

AKELAMALU: i won't give up on the detox. If I don't do it in the unit I will still do it "in the community"

SYD: thanks