HEROIN IS A DRUG TO MAKE THE WORLD GO AWAY

THIS IS A BLOG ABOUT A LIFE WITHOUT HEROIN



Saturday, 26 January 2013

New Flat ~ I just want to move in


I WENT TO SEE the new flat I was offered. It is permanent accommodation, though initially you sign up for a year, to see whether or not you're an antisocial troublemaker. I have been in "emergency accommodation" ~ where you can get moved from one end of the borough at 24 hours' notice (or even out of the borough) ~ for about ten years.

We got shown into a bare totally unfurnished place ~ no carpets, no cooker. It was very gloomy, with iron sheets over the windows that only let in pinpoints of light.

Of course there was no bath. The one  thing I said I really needed. The person before me must have been old or disabled, so they had a shower with a chair in it, that the man from the council said under no cirumstances would they change... except health grounds. So I have made an appointment with my GP. I can't believe I'm going to have to do this ~ spell out in detail some of the ridiculous problems I have had with "self care". But I have to. I ended up basically paying a friend to use his bath. Payment was made in the form of 3 litres of white cyder. The only way I have ever been able to keep and stay clean. I have lived without a bath for more than five years and am filthy dirty to prove it. I never feel clean after getting out of a shower. Even a silkwood-style shower just makes me red and sore ~ and still dirty. 

Of course if I have to I'll just move in without a bath and stay dirty for a year, because you're not allowed to add any fixtures or fittings in that first year. And pay for the bath myself. Another option is just to drag a new or old bath up there and place it so the plug hole alligns with the shower plug hole. I could fill it up using the shower and just let the water run out. It wouldn't be plumbed in or grouted on to the wall, so I wouldn't be breaking any contract.

Apart from that the place is perfect. The area is green and restful. Much nicer than any other part of this borough. Iceland (the supermarket) is only 10 minutes away, which is good. Because for the first few weeks I would be living with microwave only ~ no cooker or fridge. What I really need to get is curtains. Make it look like someone's living there. Otherwise you get squatters breaking in.

Usually, people moving into unfurnished permanent housing are eligable for a community care grant to pay for the new place to get fitted out. But I'm ineligable, because I was working before I got sick, so I paid too many national insurance stamps. I'm on contribution-based ESA, with no top-up (have never been on income support). Maybe I could get funding from some charity, but it won't come from the council. But if I'd been a sponger all my life, I would get this grant.

Apart from this the place is perfect. I don't want to live anywhere else. I just want to move the hell out of where I am now as soon as possible. The council and my support worker seem to be really dragging their feet. I want to sign something as soon as I can, so they cannot u-turn their way out. I wouldn't put it past them to show me somewhere I really like then say I can't have it and have to live in some horrorsville with no right of appeal. That's why I want to sign the contract asap ~ to pin them down.

O I've got to go. I can't think about this. It's stressing the shit out of me. I'm really glad to be moving. NOW I JUST WANT TO MOVE.

It's no problem living in unfurnished accommodation. No worse than living in a squat. (Which I did before.) But they're doing everything they can to stall the issue. I'm sorry I don't trust anyone. It all feels like mind-games. I JUST WANT TO MOVE THE FUCK IN they can sort out baths etc afterwards. Now I have to go, Binky is hammering away at my phone wanting to know where I am because I'm supposed to be bringing round frozen Chinese food + MSG. Not in the mood for it, but said I'd do it.

Sorry if this sounds misable, petty, ungrateful etc etc. (I haven't got time to sit editing this for hours to make it sound nice.) I've been in a crappy mood for days. That's why I'm on ESA to start with ~ bipolar mood swings, paranoia etc.

Hope you have a nice weekend.



Illustrated: this is what British council flats usually look like (not my block)

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

What ae you fucking stupid... bathing does not clean you effectively... you stew in your own filth even with soap!

As for the flat... are you ever going to get a job... or simply let us tax-paying citizens continue to dole out to you?

Seriously... do you have any self respect?

Dawn McCoy said...

I am glad you are getting a permanent home Gleds! Fuck that other person.

Akelamalu said...

I have to disagree with you about baths, showers keep you much cleaner as you're not sitting in dirty water. As you really want a place with a bath did you ask if there was another flat available which does have a bath? Anyway, hope you get what you want/need. x

Gledwood said...

ANONYMOUS I know I know baths are disgusting it's just when you got a bad case of the can't be bothereds but just about CAN be bothered to refill and refill with hot water over 2 hours or so, when you come out and towel dry, your skin strips off so yeah, in that case you're clean. Also nothing to stop you showering in the bath with the plug in, which is what I used to do. Then shower again before I got out. So then I got REALLY clean. I did used to be pretty obsessive about bathing and have to use friends' showers while I was at their houses for more than 2 hours, as I felt so dirty. Not that I'm OCD or anything. As for the benefits thing yes it would be better to have firing squads for the mentally unemployed, I know and agree with you. Like I say, if I were tied down and absolutely had to vote I'd vote Tory too.

KARL: thank you

AKELAMALU: I don't mind paying to get a bath put in. It's not that big a deal in that I have lived without one for years. So certainly not a change downwards.

Syd said...

Gleds, I hope that you get a nice place. Maybe having it cleaned and painted before you move in is a good idea. Anyway, hope that things go well.

Gledwood said...

I don't know whether it needs cleaning until they take the metal coverings off the windows and I can get a good look round. They're supposed to be leaving paint and brushes (presumably white paint). Brushes are just for going round light switches obviously you need rollers for painting walls you know what the council are like or maybe you don't ~ serious case of the can't be bothereds ~ anyway I'm getting the paint stuff myself. I wanna do my walls in BLUE!!